A Month Has Gone By Without A Post...Oops! :)

  So I haven't updated this in a really long time, sorry!  It's been a crazy bunch of weeks!  Starting the week of July 25, we had a group called Surf City come to "take over" camp.  Surf City is a group out of Pittsburgh that connects a bunch of youth groups in that area and brings them over (in motor coach buses) to good ole Mears, MI for a camp experience.  The Surf City staff come complete with a band, wave runners, lots of loud music, crazy outfits/costumes, and a whole lot of fun!  For a small taste of what they're like: The first day of camp the buses were greeted with an entourage of North Pole elves, reindeer, and Santa {It was Christmas in July}! During every meal the had tables set up complete with a sound system and mics for some "DJ's".  Breakfast took place during a "radio segment" called "Ketchup and Mustard in the Morning", where 2 of the staff guys wore giant Ketchup and Mustard costumes and hosted their pretend radio station from the Galley each morning.  They all had amounts of energy that I never thought possible for one single person to possess!  All-in-all, they were a blast and that was evident in each camper's face.
  Unlike the campers, my Surf City experience ended a little sooner than desired.  The second night of camp (Monday night), I went to bed early after sleeping in the Health Office for 2 hours with a stomach ache and a head ache.  Tuesday, I woke up with the same headache and proceeded to spend the day in bed resting.  Wednesday, I got out and did a few things, but still had no relief from the headache.  At dinner I had a conversation with Ben about what was going to be best for me to do, and after talking with him I made the decision to head home and get to the bottom of the pain I was having.  At 8:30 that night my parents and fiance loaded in the car and drove up to camp to pick me up because I felt unable to safely drive home alone.  The next day I went to the Dr. only to leave with no more information than the obvious: I had a migraine!  The next few days I spent resting and on Sunday had to make another decision to return to camp or stay home for a few days to return to the Dr. because I did not have the relief I needed.  Well, I ended up staying that whole week and finally returned Sunday the 8th.
  This next week was a bit different to what we had done in the past.  We held our second Treasure Seekers camp for the summer.  Treasure Seekers is for girls ages 12-14 to come and learn what it means to be a woman of God (or woman in training for these young girls).  There were only 28 girls that came so our cabin size was smaller, which was nice.  This was an amazing week!  Every girl that came to that camp was specifically placed there for a purpose and that became quite evident early in the week!  I had a few girls in my cabin alone that had been through some things that no one, let alone a 13 year old girl, should have to go through!  It was heartbreaking to hear the stories...but God is good and at the end of the week there was a drastic change evident in these girls lives! One of them did not know who Jesus was and had never heard the Gospel, but before she left Friday afternoon she made a decision to accept him as her Lord and Savior!  It was AWESOME!
  This week was also special because Grace got to be a part of the Unity Christian Music Festival in Muskegon.  Starting Thursday volunteers from camp (and others) helped at "Camp Unity" where Grace held lots of fun things like: a paintball tent (which Matthew West just happened to come take some shots in), a Ga-Ga pit, an Archery range, a climbing tower, and much more!  Friday night Jason and I decided to go to the festival to check it out and to hear Casting Crowns perform, and Saturday we actually volunteered to help out during the afternoon.  After we were done on Saturday we checked out some other booths and got to hear Mandisa, Matthew West, and Jeremy Camp!  It was a blast!
  The next week, which was the last for summer camps, I was on program staff.  I helped out with the guest group we had from Kalamazoo, and did some other end-of-the-summer cleaning.  Friday night we had our final meal together as summer staff (well, those who were still around), and we watched the staff video and then most of us headed home.  It was hard to leave!  It has been one of the best summers I have ever had, and it was spent being the hands and feet of God!  Now I've been home for 3 days and have done a great amount already, and have a LOT more to do before October 22!  But I'm so excited for this new chapter in my life, and I can't wait to see what God has in store for our new life together!
  This summer, God has taught me many things.  But as I look back one thing stands out among the rest.  To trust Him with everything!  Not just what I'm comfortable giving to Him, but EVERYTHING!  This has prepared me to be the wife and woman that God wants me to be.  Jason and I don't have much of an idea as to what's to come in the next couple of years, but if we put our complete trust in God we know that He will provide wherever we are or in whatever we are doing.  One of my favorite verses fits perfectly in with what I have learned this summer, and I will end with it. "Trust in the Lord with ALL of your heart, lean not on your own understanding.  In ALL your ways acknowledge Him, and HE will direct your paths." Proverbs 3:5-6

"Take my fret, take my fear. All I have, I'm leaving here"

  So being here at camp has allowed me to expand my worship music collection (which is slightly hazardous with almost instant access to itunes).  This week, since we haven't had any campers I have been listening to music as I fall asleep and there has been one song that has filled me a lot.  So often I find myself holding on to those things that I know I need to let go.  With the different atmostphere we have had this week with family camp, my thoughts were quite often focused on my wedding, home, and missing Jason a lot.  Obviously since I am away all summer I am not able to continue to finish planning wedding stuff, and last weekend Jason and I signed the lease agreement to our new apartment and that was a huge burden off my shoulders and also a blessing that we were able to get into the place that we want!  So even though i am away and not able to do those things, God has reminded me to let go and not worry about them because they are still being done back home even if I don't have a hand in every single part (like sometimes I feel I need), and everything is coming together! This song has helped me to focus my thoughts back on God and trusting him as I can't do things alone, so that I am not distracted from my job this summer as a counselor.  The song is called "Only You" and it is by David Crowder Band, here are the lyrics:
  Take my heart, I lay it down
  At the feet of you whose crowned
  Take my life, I'm letting go
  I life it up to you who's throned
And I will worhsip You, Lord
Only You, Lord
And I will bow down before You
Only You, Lord
  Take my fret, take my fear
  All I have, I'm leaving here
  Be all my hopes, be all my dreams
  Be all my delights, be my everything
And It's just You and me here now
Only You and me here now
  You should see the view
  When it's only You

Please pray for a good night's rest tonight and lots of energy from God this week and the rest of the weeks to come!

Family Camp

  So I haven't had a lot of time to get on here and update, and it's past my bed time so I'll make it quick for your sake and mine! :)  Last week was the first week of "Venture Out" which is the age group 12-14, or in my case this week it was 11-14 (which is also my primary age group).  It was a blast, but really stressful at the same time.  I wasn't feeling well the first couple of days and had to stay in bed and back from a few activities with my girls which was a big bummer, but it didn't last the whole week which was good!  My girls all seemed to bond really well, but there were a few times that they would butt heads!  At the beginning of the week the parents could sign the kids up for certain activities throughout the week.  One day they went to Craig's Cruisers, and another day on a trail ride.  They had a lot of fun on both of those!
  Another highlight of the week was the car smash.  And yes, that is exactly what it sounds....a car smash!  A tow truck rolled in the parking lot on Thursday morning with 2 junk cars attached and dropped them off on top of a massive tarp.  The kids took turns wearing safety goggles, gloves, and of course close toed shoes to have a 5 minute turn smashing the cars to pieces with sledge hammers, axes, and other tools.  This was a HIT! (no pun intended! ha!) One of my girls however, ended her turn with a trip to the Ludington hospital to have glass removed from her finger and 5 stitches placed in it to close up a large cut.  She was fine and just not able to do some of the things for the next few days (like swimming, ropes climbing).  After the car smash, we ended the night with an air band performance that each cabin had come up with a routine to a song of choice to perform for the judges and the rest of the cabins.  This also was a hit! And not only that, but MY girls won! :)  They had a hard time agreeing and getting along during the planning, but it all came together awesomely and everyone loved it! They did theirs to "Eye of the Tiger" which I thought was interesting to pick for a group of girls, but they used flashlights while all the lights in the gym were off and it looked sweet!  That was pretty much the highlights of the week!
  The past few weeks has been hard because they have ALL been so different.  I first had 7-9 year olds, and then jumped all the way to high schoolers, and then down to 12-14, and now this week is Family camp.  It's been hard to find a constant between the camps because even the teaching material is slightly different, so adjusting has been difficult for sure!  But this week has been completely different as we are not counselors, but we are hosts of a family.  25 families traveled in on Sunday afternoon from all, and some even came with a van and trailer!  The biggest family we have here is a family of 11, 9 kids and 2 adults.  It is nuts! About 7 families left today and 5 new ones moved in, but the rest of them are here for the whole week which includes Saturday until about 1:00pm which is different than normal!  So pray for much needed rest this week and weekend as there won't be a big opportunity to get that before next week's camp! All else is well, and now I must sleep! :) I hope everyone had a good 4th! Goodnight!

Weekend Extravaganza

 So the weekends come and go, just like the last month has come and gone! I can't believe that the 4th of July is so soon! What happened to June? Today (Saturday) I went to the dunes to ride on the sand with Kate and friends. It was my first time out there and I was a bit nervous at first, but it was so much fun! After a day in the sun, I am even more exhausted than I was before!
  I was just looking through some photos on Facebook and realized that not only have I been gone for a month already, I have also not seen some of my family members that entire time either and I'm sitting here almost in tears realizing how much I miss them all! It's crazy how busy I have been and how little time I have had to visit with the people who mean the most in my life! I hope to get a chance to ride over to the cottage next weekend to be able to spend some quality time with them (for the little time I get off)! Anyways, my laundry is almost done then it's time to hit-the-hay...I love and miss you family/fiance/friends!

In this Edition of "I Survived": I Survived my First Backpacking Experience

  It's about 2:50 Thursday afternoon and we rolled into Mears, MI about 1:50.  Our backpacking trip was, well...interesting.  We left the island about 11:30 Wednesday morning and made it up to Manistee National Forest about 12:40 to begin lunch and start our hike.  Lunch consisted of cheesy brats and baked beans...I'm not sure why they chose baked beans especially when there are no bathrooms, but all I have to say is I'm glad I wasn't in the boys tent!
  The group decided to hike along Lake Michigan because it was more flat and easier to do.  We started out the trip with an 80% chance of rain throughout the rest of the day, but at first the weather was perfect! We hiked a little ways and then stopped for a break until we reached a spot (after an hour of hiking) that looked like a good one.  So the kids went to check it out.  The trees had sort of been cleared out a little bit and there seemed to be a path leading up the hill to the top where a pile of sticks and a few ropes for a clothes line had been left from previous hikers.  They decided that this was going to be the spot so we got everyone to the top and started to set up camp. 
  4 tents, 2 hammocks, 2 designated areas to use the forest's facilities and one fire later, they decided they wanted to swim.  I grabbed my towel and headed down as well, but ended up taking a nap on the beach for about an hour and woke up to dinner being ready.  Dinner consisted of burritos and once again, glad I wasn't in the boys tent! After dinner we had a time of a few teachings and then they were free to do whatever.
  Still the weather was perfect, but we could see and hear the beginnings of some storms coming across the lake.  It wasn't until about midnight when the rain decided to hit, and it hit hard! There wasn't much lightning or thunder, but the wind was strong!  The shaking of the tent and the fear of the food bag, that they strategically hung in a tree about my tent, falling on me kept me up for a few hours.  But then finally I got some sleep and woke up peacefully at 8:00.
  We had breakfast and some personal devotions time in the morning, along with a discussion about what was going on with the team dynamics.  They have had a hard time all getting along and deciding where the line of fun sarcasm and hurtful sarcasm is, and now they don't feel the need to fix the problems because they go home tomorrow.  Well, my hour long break has come and gone and I better head back! :)

The Quest to the Island

  This week I am working with Quest campers, which is our 16 &17 age group who come for one week of training and then come back one other week in the summer as a CIT.  We are on "Leadership Island" which is pretty rustic like I mentioned in my last post! So far it has been pretty good though.  Last night we had some storms, but I seemed to sleep right through them which was odd because I've not had my fan and it's really quiet for my liking.  We got to come back to main camp yesterday to train the kids on the high adventure stuff and take showers, and today we are back again to shower and teach them about "ages and stages" (behavioral patterns for certain age groups, etc.)  The questers got their mission last night for our "out trip" which is taking place starting tomorrow.  They were given a few instructions about the backpacking we will be doing up in the Manistee National Forest.  They are planning everything from what we will be eating to what our schedule looks like.  The other staff and I almost had no food for the trip nor a place to sleep, but then we hinted to them that we would like to eat as well.  I think they planned to have burritos and baked beans, and well...bathrooms during this trip have quite the natural scene (if you know what I mean) so we'll see how that goes! The group has some pretty strong headed people and some pretty laid back not very involved people and we have been trying to encourage them all to make sure everyone is being included...but so far we've had a lot of arguments and disagreements! It should get better, I hope..or it may be a loooooong trip! Well, I'm going to get a nap in for the remaining portion of my hour off and then get a shower in very soon! :)

Week 1 of Discovery Camp

  So this first week of camp I worked with our Discovery campers who are from ages 7-9. This was a treat! Most of my girls had not been to a camp (other than day camp) before, so they was so excited to be there! I was supposed to have 8 girls, but one didn't show up.  I made name tags for the girls bunks and also made a matching bracelet for each one; they LOVED them!  When they arrived I also had them color a flower that was attached to a Popsicle stick to be used for our daily clean ups. They arrived between 9:00 and 10:00 Tuesday morning and stayed until 4:00 Friday afternoon.  The first day we played some name games to get to know each other, experienced a fire drill in our cabin, and set some expectations for what we were and were not going to allow happen in our cabin.  The girls chose to be good listeners, to have good behavior, and to be good participators.  This came in handy when we had some problems.  I could sit them down and ask them to tell me our expectations and then ask how we were doing on those and what we could do to do them better.  For the most part the girls followed those expectations pretty well and I even heard a few of them from time to time say to the other girls, "guys, we need to do better with our expectations right now."
  So after all of that we went over to have a time of chapel and then to lunch.  They were so energized and excited to sing some silly songs and watch some skits. (I even had to do a skit every day, and if you know me....that's not typical!)  After chapel we had lunch and then an orientation at the waterfront and some free time.  Throughout the week when I asked the girls what their favorite activity was so far, almost all of them said it was swimming!  They could build sand castles, swim in the shallow area, go down the slide, jump on the water tramp, and even be pulled behind the speed-boat on the "Triton" (our 6 person tube thing that looks like 2 rocket ships side by side and the straddle them).  Then we had some "prime time" (a time block for a specific activity that each cabin does together) and this time they went to the arts and crafts room and painted small cardboard like pots that they later put dirt and some seeds in to go along with our gardening type theme. After prime time we had dinner and at dinner Melissa, my friend who usually runs the arts and crafts room told me a funny story.  There were 2 cabins in there at the same time and she asked the first cabin what they knew so far about their counselor and they said, "she says if we kill a bug or do a good job on something we can pick a prize from the prize box," then she asked my girls what they knew about me and they said, "she makes us do chores!" Oh dear! I guess I was a little too excited about my creative idea to have flowers in pots for the chore "chart"! :) But they wanted to have the cleanest cabin and win the trophy each day for it, and we did...so I guess it worked?! After dinner we had a Bible Study and an evening activity and then we took showers and got ready for bed.  The first night stormed, and most of the girls would scream at every crash or flash! I thought we were going to be doomed for getting a good nights sleep, but they were all sleeping within 20 minutes after lights out.
  During Bible study Wednesday night, the girls started asking questions about the Trinity and how God and Jesus can be the same person and I said that God was 3 people: father, son, and holy spirit, but still 1 person and one of the girls said, "so like 3-in-1 shampoo."  And I sort of chuckled and then said she was exactly right.  I thought it was cute, and that's the way a child's mind works if they can associate a new thing with something else that they know then they can remember it better.  She had brought 3-in-1 shampoo and she wanted to show it to me when she was about to get in the shower that morning.  There was one little girl that seemed to continue to have problems.  She was from Urban Family Ministries and she started out the week very clingy to me.  Every time she bumped her toe or elbow she thought she wasn't able to do anything.  I think she was trying to get as much attention as she could, which she probably doesn't get a whole lot at home.  We have a 1-2-3 policy at Grace for behavior problems: The first time it could be chance, the second time there is a pattern (find it), and the third time there is a problem (change something).  Friday afternoon after the campers left we had a meeting to discuss things that went well and not well and more than one person said they thought they gave out too many 1's and after thinking about it, I probably did with this girl too.  I finally got a core staff involved Thursday night and every time we had a behavior problem after that...but I probably could have saved a few "gray hairs" if I would have gotten them involved earlier.  But all in all it was a great first week!
  Starting on Sunday I move over to Leadership Island to work with the Quest group.  They are 16-17 year olds who come for a week of training, and then they can come back 1 week during the summer as a CIT (counselor in training).  The curriculum that they go through is the same that I went through for Cornerstone and also that we did during staff training, so I'm really excited to work with them!  The only part I'm not AS excited about is that Leadership Island is exactly what it sounds: an island.  All that it includes is a fire pit, a few canvas tents, a pavilion with some picnic tables, and a couple (I don't even want to say this word) porta johns!  Yes, that means NO running water, NO showers, NO lights, and NO fans to stay cool!  It's going to be an interesting week, but a really good experience I think! :)  Well, my parents, Jason and I headed up to Ludington for the night and I think it's time to take a little nap to try to catch up on some sleep!  The summer weather is finally here (knock on wood), enjoy! :)

Plumbing 101

  This week has been great!  We have been able to actually do some stuff with kids instead of sitting and listening to teachings.  Monday night we loaded the bus around 4:30 and headed down to Grand Rapids to put on a "carnival" for Urban Family Ministries.  We set up a bunch of different activities including bean bag toss, roping (as in roping the cow head like a cowboy), face painting, crafts and more.  We also cooked hot dogs and made some popcorn.  It was a blast!  Urban Family Ministries is starting a new partnership with a ministry out of Muskegon and this year they have 85 kids that are going to be coming to camp this summer, and that is awesome! 
  Today (Wednesday) we put on a day camp for K-8th grades at Oceana Christian Schools.  We picked them up from school at about noon and drove them back to camp for a time of chapel, large group games, and one camp activity.  We split up into our operational groups, meaning the other counselors that are working in our primary age group, and combined we had 4th,  5th and 6th graders.  After the large group games a few other counselors and myself took the 5th and 6th graders over to the archery/riffle ranges.  Some of the kids were disappointed that they could not be on the waterfront, but with the time we were allowed and what we had planned it just wouldn't have been possible. 
  I got some great experience during this time.  One of the girls who decided in the beginning that she was going to do riffles then changed her mind and was sent over to archery, however she didn't make it over and ended up alone sitting on a log (on her CELL phone, a 5th grader with a cell phone..oh dear!).  My core staff leader (supervisior like) tried talking to her and then asked me if I would talk to her.  I tried convinceing her to try archery, but she refused.  I then asked if she would at least come join the group so she wasn't alone, and she agreed.  To make a long story short, she ended up doing the archery and having a lot of fun.  It was good for me to get a feel for what it will be like with my campers who wander off because they don't want to participate, and how I will have to handle those situations.  All in all it was a great day!
  So, you may be wondering as to why my title of this post is what it is...?  Earlier this morning, the maintenance guy Luke gave a 45 minute speech, or better yet "lesson", on how to plunge a toilet!  It was actually quite comical; except for the fact that our next activity was lunch!  We got a history, philosophical, biblical, and hands on lesson all on plumbing a toilet, and that includes the "5 categories of a clog"!  And you can only imagine the rest! :)
  The past few nights and the rest of the nights of training we have a lot of down time to prepare for camp on Sunday and also to read our never ending a hundred and some page staff manual that we have to have done by Friday and sign a paper saying we read and understand it, yuck!  Tonight we addressed our letters of support that we each have to send out to 20 family/friends and are soon going to have a bonfire complete with smores and a worship time.  If all 40 summer staff members send out 20 letters and everyone commits to praying for/with us, we will have 800 people praying for our summer ministry.  As Ben said earlier today, "We are on the front lines of battle, and Satan doesn't like it because people's lives are changed and he continues to lose!"  The letters also include a section for the people to choose if they would like to financially support the camp.  The money donated technically goes towards our pay, but in reality it helps run our scholarship program so that kids who are not able to attend because of financial reasons have an opportunity to do so.  The money that camp would have paid us that is "replaced", if you will, is what then goes towards that fund.  (If that makes sense...?)  Last year they raised $85,000 so you can imagine how many kids (and also families for family camp) were able to attend.  Over 200 commitments or re-commitments to Christ were made last year, and hopefully we have even more this year.  So far all of the originally scheduled camp dates are booked and they have opened several more weeks to try to fit everyone in.  I feel incredibly blessed to be able to be a part of this ministry this summer and to have the chance to impact the lives of young girls coming from all different backgrounds!  It's going to be a blast, and we're only 4 days away until the first day of camp!  Thank you for all the prayers and support, it is more appreciated than you know! :)
-Amanda

Sabbath

  The quote often heard around camp: "A day is a week, and a week is a month".  After the first few days of being here I started realizing the reality of that.  The days seem to go by fast, but trying to think back to the day before seems like forever.  These first 11 days have been all staff training.  We started the week staying in the bunk houses at the ranch and Friday night we moved over to main camp.  It has been fun to start getting to know all the summer staff along as the full time staff.  A big portion of the training has been "leadership training", which has been very similar to LJ: the program that I went through up here with Cornerstone.  We have split up into small groups and we go through "missions" with each other and after each mission we have spend time talking about how we communicated, if the mission was successful or not, etc.  We have also been going through the curriculum for the summer and specifically doing the daily devotions that our campers will do each day of the week.  On Thursday we learned about behavior styles.  All of the staff were asked questions and we had to move according to our answers and how we would rather respond.  There are 4 categories that most people fall into, but we don't just have qualities from that one category.  It was interesting to see that and where the staff has put themselves and it then explains the way that we all respond in certain situations, it will also be nice when we get a cabin and some girls behave differently than others.
  This week has been physically, mentally, and emotionally exhausting...but that is a reality of what the summer will most likely be.  I haven't had a chance to be taking any pictures yet, so I don't have any to share, sorry! :(  The internet access is very limited as you can tell (since this is the first chance I have had to get on since I've been here), so I probably won't be updating more than once a week and possibly twice if we have a non-busy day (but those also are limited).  Today we have the entire afternoon from lunch to dinner to have a day of Sabbath/rest.  It is important for us to take some time to slow ourselves down after being pushed and going non-stop for a week.  So I think it's nap time! :) Please pray for continued growth in Christ as the weeks and summer goes on, along with growth with the rest of the staff. 

Packing, packing & more packing

  So I leave tomorrow.  Can't really believe it though; it seems like just yesterday I had the interview with Ben at Burger King.  I'm super excited, but a little sad to not see my fiance, family or friends most of the summer, but hopefully I'll make some new friends too!  Today has been full of packing, and I can already tell that I am bringing too much!  But what's a girl to do? :)  I hope to get to bed at a decent time tonight, but I'm not sure how much sleep I will actually get as my nerves and excitement really start to sink in! Well, back to my bags and making decorations/name signs for my cabin! Only a few more hours until the summer of a lifetime! :)

2 Weeks

   2 weeks from today I will have experienced my first day of counselor training.  The past couple weeks have been super busy making some big decisions for the wedding, like: booking the church & reception hall, going for a tasting and picking the food, meeting with the florist, and even a fun engagement photo shoot with our photographers.  It's been sort of stressful, but still fun.  I can't believe that camp is so close, it seems like just yesterday I met with Ben (camp coordinator/my boss) at Burger King in Hudsonville for my interview!
   I will be primarily working with middle-school aged girls (12-14yrs), but will also be trained for all ages so that I can be moved around when needed.  This week I received the curriculum for that age group and was excited to read through it and get familiar with the Bible verses, activities and stories used.  The theme for the summer is "Get Rooted!" and as you probably figured out, the main verse (which is at the top of the page) is Colossians 2:6-7, but each day of the week there is a different memory verse starting on Sunday with the main one.
   Each day of the week will also have a different mini-theme, but as an overview to the week, our campers will learn the concepts of faith rooted deep in Christ as compared to a gardening metaphor.  During the discussion time on Sunday the lesson objective is to: "Introduce the metaphor of gardening for the week; set expectations, understand God's role as gardener in the "Get Rooted!" theme."  As a cabin we will set expectations for the week while trying to connect them to a garden and gardening.  For example, two of the questions asked the first day are: "What are some good things we want to have happen this week? (what are good things in our garden)" and, "What are some things we don't want to have happen?" (what destroys a garden)".  By the end of the week the "goal" (if you will) of the last day is for the campers to understand their personal faith and what that means to them and to be able to go out into their worlds and demonstrate that meaning to family and friends through words/actions so that others can see the work of God in their lives.
   So these next two weeks will be filled with some quality time with family and friends, more wedding planning, and lots of packing for camp while continuing to learn the curriculum.  This week I have specifically been praying for the hearts of the children, and also my own heart as well.  Praying that they (& I) will be open to the experiences of the week.  Also, for the envirionment that I hope to create; I pray it will be one that the campers know is safe so that they can fully open up to me and I to them.  Thank you everyone for the support you have already shown!
-Amanda